A Truth to Believe

God Creates

The God of the Bible is a creating God (Gen 1:1). God alone originated, designed, and made the heavens, the earth, and all that they contain both visible and invisible except for evil and sin (Acts 17:24; Col 1:16). As the creating God, he is the only king of the universe with ultimate authority and lordship (Isa. 43:14–15).

God did not create because he needed or lacked (Acts 17:25). Instead, God willingly and joyfully overflowed in creating everything out of nothing in order to communicate his holiness, beauty, and goodness (Neh. 9:6; Ps. 8:3–9; Acts 14:15).

God creates according to his divine purposes and pleasure (Rev. 4:11). While God creates for the good of his creatures, his ultimate end in creating is to bring glory to his own great name (Acts 17:26–27; Rev. 14:7), and he should be worshiped because of it (Pss. 33:6–9, 95:3–7; Rev. 4:11).

God is still in the business of creating today (Col 3:11). He continues to give new earthly life (Ps. 139:13–16), create new spiritual life in himself (2 Cor. 5:17; Eph 4:24), and will one day create a new heavens and new earth (Rev 21:1). Our God is a creating God.

I will say to the north, “Give up, and to the south, do not withhold; bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the end of the earth, everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made” (Isaiah 43:6-7).

Something about Living

Persevering Over the Long Haul as a Caregiver: Five Things to Prioritize & Five Things to Reduce

Caregiving takes many forms over different durations of time. Someone may be a caregiver for a short portion, an extended season, or the majority of one's life. The caregiving role never comes knocking to see when it's the most convenient time. The needs of those we love don't get scheduled into our five or ten year plan. They just happen, sometimes dramatically while other times they build with intensity over time.

The requirements of caregiving are often similar, although the unique challenges can be vastly different. Caregiving requires sacrifice, humility, servanthood, patience, endurance, diligence, and as one authors says, "grit and grace," especially if you want to make it over the long haul.

Mental health and keeping one's distance from a breaking point are real realities in caregiving. We have personally known several caregivers who have experienced dangerous mental breaking points winding up in the hospital as a result. Talking about making it over the long haul isn't only a conversation about being a good caregiver. It is a conversation about maintaining a healthy mental, emotional, and spiritual load to care for another over a sustained period of time.

Over our years as caregivers, we have learned several things that help and hindered us in fulfilling our responsibility as caregivers. These aren't laws or requirements. They are ideas. Things that have worked for us over the years and continue to play a role in our daily life.

We also want to recognize that sometimes there are extremely intense seasons of care. We have had several such seasons with our Levi. They have lasted from extreme four month hospital stays, to 6-12 month long stretches of medical intensity at home, to simply hard individual days that come up on a weekly basis. There are seasons to survive in and others where you can take more concrete steps towards thriving.

This means we don't always have the ability to give as much time to thinking about living and caregiving because the care sometimes takes up every ounce of our mental, physical, and emotional attention. So use some of those less intense moments of caregiving to give some thought to your life.

On the flip side, we have also learned that those intense seasons still often afford moments of thought where decisions can be made. And sometimes they are the best moments to make decisions because reality is hitting you squarely between the eyes. Prioritizing and reducing are often actually something of a necessity in these times.

So, from one caregiver to another, here are some ideas to help you persevere on the good task that God has called you toward. And remember “God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work” (2 Cor. 9:8).

Five things to Prioritize:

1. The state of your soul: spend unhurried and consistent time in God's word & prayer

2. Your physical presence at a local church: keep prioritizing gathering with your local church

3. Stewardship of your body: As much as you are able, make sure you are sleeping, eating well, and doing some regular form of exercise.

4. Moments of rest: even a short moment of quiet or a quick walk can do wonders.

5. Foundational relationships: don't neglect at least one or two consistent friendships to encourage others and be encouraged

Five things to Reduce:

1. Unhealthy relationships: some relationships are detrimental to the primarily responsibility God has given you. You may need to make an intentional friend shift.

2. Too many commitments: schedules fill up especially as needs change. Some times we need to end something we thought we could do, be a part of, keep up with, or that sounded beneficial.

3. Optional stressful circumstances: if you are dreading something, think carefully about whether that thing is serving you and your family or you are serving it.

4. Entertainment and hobbies: these are optional and unnecessary things in life. Often they can end up draining more than reviving your soul. Be ruthless.

5. Your expectations and plans: sometimes we simply need to recalibrate what we are hoping and desiring for a day, a week, or a season. Hold things loosely because life changes quickly, and you’re really not in control.

A Quote

"God comes first. It is such an elementary point, but it needs to be articulated. Before anything else was, before there was a universe in the beginning: God. He comes first."

D. A. Carson

A Resource

Books are such a wonderful resource. As parents of a child with very complex needs, we have had to become motivated learners.

There are wonderful resources out there for parents of children withe disabilities. Here are the books we have found most helpful over the years for parents of children with special needs.